Caregiving for those who live with addiction

Caregivers for people with addiction are often blamed and isolated, while facing unique caregiving challenges that can profoundly impact their well-being. They support a loved one who may reject or sabotage their help through cycles of high stress that can persist for many years. The shame associated with addiction makes it hard to talk about, putting caregivers at risk of depression, anxiety and even PTSD.

How can we better support our community members who do their best to guide someone towards recovery? First, let’s explore the specific caregiving challenges that come with an addiction-based caregiving scenario.

A constant state of emergency

Caregivers of addiction patients live in a state of perpetual high alert. This leads to chronic stress, anxiety and exhaustion that can continue even when their care recipient goes through a stable phase. Such intensity can trigger their own mental health issues, including depression, guilt, panic attacks and sleep disorders. The unpredictable nature of addiction means caregivers rarely experience true peace of mind.

Financial costs

For family caregivers of people with addiction, there are specific financial costs not associated with other caregiving roles. Treatment such as recovery services may not be covered by provincial health plans. Caregivers may need to take time off work for crisis interventions or court appearances. Some may end up paying for damaged or stolen property, private treatment or legal fees. These can be recurring costs that accumulate quickly.

There are also some unique practical challenges. Caregivers may need to secure their homes, hide valuables or change locks repeatedly. Some will provide housing for their loved one, only to have the arrangement fail.

The long-term impact can be serious. There may be negative impacts on their retirement savings, credit report and their personal or professional references. Their employment status could become destabilized. They could even face housing instability if their care recipient disrupts their landlord or neighbours.

Feeling misunderstood

Addiction is misunderstood, and treatment approaches can be controversial. This often leaves caregivers having to explain and justify their choices. Advice such as “just cut them off” is often offered with good intentions, aiming to protect the caregiver or prompt change, but it can feel deeply insensitive, especially when the loved one struggling with addiction is a child or spouse. The shame and stigma surrounding addiction can lead to secrecy, further compounding the isolation.

Prolonged exposure to trauma

Caregivers of people with addiction may experience traumatic events such as violent behaviour or overdoses. Addiction can be cyclical, with repeated attempts at recovery and repeated lapses. This means caregivers can’t recover as they’re continually exposed.

How can Canadians support caregivers in an addiction-based scenario?

Caregivers providing support to a person with an addiction need comprehensive protection from the negative outcomes associated with their role. Here are some key areas where their community can try to help.

Therapy: Many provinces offer programs for family members through addiction treatment centres, but waitlists can be long. Private therapy, support groups like Families Anonymous and online resources can provide immediate help. Encouraging caregivers to get involved, regardless of whether their loved one participates, is a healthy way to give support. Even joining a private social media group for families of people with addiction can help caregivers feel less isolated.

Practical Resources: Caregivers may end up navigating numerous different agencies and treatment support options in their attempt to support their loved one. Gathering information can be an overwhelming task. Offering to help a caregiver conduct research is a practical way for friends and family can help. Genius Recovery is an online resource that can be a good starting point.

Self-Care Strategies: Caregivers need reassurance that taking care of themselves should be a priority. Caregiving for someone with an addiction can become all-consuming. Help them find outlets to rest and, if appropriate, take over some of their caregiving duties. Encourage them to set proper boundaries to protect their own well-being, while being careful to avoid judgmental language. For example, telling them “It’s ok to protect your own health/finances” keeps the focus on them rather than on the person with the addiction.

Financial Planning: Understanding available benefits, insurance coverage and legal protections can help caregivers make informed decisions about boundaries and support levels. If appropriate, offer to be a neutral third party to help families negotiate fair and appropriate financial support.

Speaking with Compassion: Caregivers of people with addiction deserve compassion. They’re not enabling because they continue to love and support someone with a substance use disorder. However, they do need resources, community support and permission to set boundaries.

Summary

As Canada continues to evolve its approach to addiction treatment and harm reduction, supporting family caregivers needs through community engagement is something we can all do. The well-being of caregivers isn’t secondary to the care recipient’s needs, as family stability is critical to long-term recovery. The biggest risk to caregivers of people with addictions is isolation. Keeping the lines of communication open requires a compassionate, non-judgmental approach.